Monday, May 24, 2010

Letting go....

Let me preface this by saying that today's blog post is all about me. If other people can take something away from it, then that would be wonderful, but this post is truly just about my own reflectiveness at this point.

Ok, caveat laid out.

If you have been following my blog, then you know that it has been a rather difficult year for me. I have been struggling to find direction and meaning in the wake of those rather unsettling events.

I have turned to to Osho Zen Meditation Tarot deck, among other sources, to find guidance.

My dreams have been deep, vivid, and frought with symbolism.

I have asked for advice from friends and loved ones.

And I keep coming back to one phrase: Let it go.

For we can not control what happens to us, but we can control how we react.

Let me repeat that.

We can not control what happens to us, but we can control how we react.

The universe, it seems, has a rather wicked and twisted sense of humor. It often throws curves at us that we do not expect.

Some of them are quite unintentioned, to be sure.

Others, more premeditated.

But the results are the same. They leave us feeling betrayed, beaten, exposed, robbed.

I spent the weekend doing a lot of very deep thinking. So deep, in fact, it made my brain hurt.

And I realized that it is time to let go of all of the crap that I have been letting get to me.

Job crap.

Personal crap.

Even world crap.

And I am determined to focus on being the best person I can be, doing what I believe to be right and good, while holding onto my own standards. I never set out to undermine anyone or to harm them. In fact, the truth is quite the opposite.

Sure, other people may get in my way. They may try to steal my thunder. They may misinterpret my intentions or my responses. They may even think I'm wrong.

But that's ok.

Because I'm letting it go.

Something bigger, better, and wonderful is out there, just waiting for me. I know that. I just have to let all this baggage go that is weighing me down, and I'll reach it.

Then, I can fly. Like I used to do on the swings at the playground, when I let go of the chains as I reached the peak of the swing arc.

Let go with me, and let's fly together.

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