Monday, March 15, 2010
Loving and Living
Tonight, my husband posted a status on his Facebook account that said something like this: "Today was a very long day, tomorrow and Wednesday will be even longer. Luckily, I have a wonderful wife who will help me make it to Friday."
God, he's sweet.
But he's more than that. He is my lifeline.
I've been blogging here about my recent obstacles, and how I have been trying to overcome them, and find my true bliss. I am not new to struggle. In fact, I have faced struggle after struggle my entire life.
I am a survivor. It's what I do.
And yet, until I met Dave, I always survived ALONE. I turned inward, adopted a self-protective stance, much like the hedgehog that curls up in a ball with quills exposed to the dangers that threaten it.
It worked, and I always managed to overcome, to supercede, to survive. But I never thrived. I never knew my bliss.
And then, almost by accident, I met this incredible, wonderful, miraculous man who changed my life.
And when I met Dave, I realized that I was not truly living my life before. I was only going through the motions.
Because, you see, living is nothing without loving. And loving means truly living.
When you can trust someone with your soul, it is an amazing thing.
And my soul mate, Dave has done that for me. We knew at the end of our first date that we were destined to be together. And we were married less than two years later.
The truly amazing thing now, though, is that I no longer roll up like a hedgehog when the predators come sniffing. Now I take hold of Dave's hand, and we face them together, side by side.
And it is truly mind boggling the difference that it has made. With Dave by my side, I can move forward, exploring my possible paths, without trepidation that I will fail. Dave has confidence in me. He believes in me. And I know, whatever happens, that Dave will be there by my side to help me face my foes. And he will be the first to uncork the champagne to celebrate when I conquer them.
With Dave, I fly.
My Dave, who has supported my psychic side, without question, from the day we met.
My Dave, who never scoffs when I tell him I see things, or know things, or have "feelings," and who thinks it's a normal conversation to ask "so, seen any spirits lately?"
My Dave, who told me not to worry when I first told him that I thought I would be denied tenure, because, he said, things will work out.
My Dave, who always can make me laugh, and who takes my breath away with passion and love.
So, tonight, as I reflect, I focus on the most wonderful, positive, amazing part of my life - the part that means I LIVE each and every day. And I give thanks that I finally found him on my life's journey.
And I wish for all of you that you can find and experience this love that helps you truly and fully live each day with joy.
I love you, Dave. You are my soul mate. With you, I live.